OK well so far all i have done is work and work and work some more and i hate it. but im really happy with Ryan so its all good, for our 8th month he bought me this really pretty braclet from james avery so hes learning. hah well yea anyway i miss all my compadres but i guess most of them work also and im just never home. oh well steph if u ever get to read this give me a call i miss u home slice. oh well if ya wanna say hey give me a call love yall......

XO: JaYmEe XO:

untill the day i die................

well what do ya know im stuck at home board off my ass i seriously dont have anything to do. ryans at a stupid show and im stuck here, things are getting better i guess i mean were actually happy. But like the entry before i still dont trust him so it sucks not knowing what hes doing at the moment. dude steph if u read this i think my life is over.............................again. im so fucking stupid. call me.

XO: JaYmEe XO:

untill the day i die.......................

Things are hard when u cant trust someone even when u love them to death. when u have this empty feeling in your stomach and hes not there u wonder what hes doing and who hes with and if hes gunna tell u the truth about where he was and who he was with. it sucks when his friends tell you what he was really doing and who he was really with and what he really said. his problem is that he only wants to make me happy so he tells me what he thinks will make me happy when really all i wanna know is the truth. he says he doesnt wanna loose me but yet he lies and when he finally says hell stop more and more lies just keep comin out. i mean who are u supposed to believe, the one you love or his friends. in this case i dunno...........it hurst to tell him "i cant trust you" and i know it hurts him to hear that. he asks if he can earn it back, but honestly will i ever fully trust him again? i mean truth is sacred and strong and once someone breaks it, it never really is ever there again. i dunno its a sad part of life.

XO: JaYmEe XO:

.................................................i love him, but i dont trust him

well i had a good/bad weekend. ryans show went really well but that night didnt for me and him we had a fight about the most dumbest thing but it was his fault. thurs. night was odd i went out with steph, pompa, jordan, and matt to the rabbit it was interesting lol.  ummmmmmm. sat me n ryan were supposed to work but they called us and we got the day off so i made him take me to the mall then we went back to his house and pigged out like no other. then sunday hhahahahahahahah sunday was horrible lets just say we had a bad day and leave it at that. oh well what can i say...................

XO: JaYmEe XO:

until the day i die......................

damn ok whoever u are that keeps talking shit to me u obviously have no life if this is what u do. so fuck offfffffffff!!!           ne ways just here at school chilin not doing a damn thing thinking about how i so do not wanna go to work on friday b/c i hate it fiesta texas sucks big balls!!!!!!!!! oh well if anyone who reads this besides the shit talker wants to go ryans having a show friday night at eisenhower park at 6:00 so if u love me ill see u there!!!!!!!!! oh well im out i love u baby if u ever read this.

XO: JaYmEe XO:

untill the day i die....................

Ok well me and ryan are getting much better(knock on wood) and yea tomorrow will me 6 months for me and him so i hope that goes ok. but yea that other day was just a really bad day i guess at times u have to stop someone u love and tell them straight up whats wrong and what they need to so to make it better but also no to mention whats wrong with u. but yea monique thanks for the advise and tomlin thanks u soo much its so weird how u know me so well and thats ur my best friend kiddo u helped me a lot i was about  to make the biggest mistake of my life. i guess in time things will all work out. lol i finally got to go shopping my friend candice took me and i kinda wish ryan would of. oh wait we are going to day after my last day of drivers ed yea yaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!

XO: JaYmEe XO:

untill the day i die..................

I hate guys i really really do. i mean if u ask a guy to take u shopping hill procrastinate hell be like oh im tired i know i told u i would take u today but im tired i promise u ill take u on tuesday so im all happy right b/c i get to spend time with my baby but no hes decides to tell me oh yea hey i have practice i cant take u so im pissed. i think i have a right to be and he thinks i dont he thinks im just being selfish but i guess thats his point of view and this is mine monique tell me what u think..............

XO: JaYmEe XO:

untill the day i die..............................

Hey steph u know i love u and ryan tomlin your the bestist and monique dude that star on ur back is so cute and ur belly that's cute also. ok so yea mo patrick always has ur picture with him its so cute b/c when ever he has a break he just pulls it out and stairs at u. but yea i hope u n jenn had fun at the beach. jennnnnnnnnnn i miss u to chika and we will spend some time together just let be get sometime off of work like i told steph we should go get are nails done like a bunch of gurlie girls on friday!!!!!!!! yea and steph dont ever tell ne one were not friends b/c we always will and by the way paint ur toe nails hahhahaha. neways im out and ryan i love u baby and remember ur not sick fucker!!!!!

XO: JaYmEe XO:

i love ryan forever...............

Ok ryans taking a shit but ne ways we jsut got home from work and let me tell u fiesta texas sucks ass. but yea oh well i get paid right. i dont really have much to write about except that the other day manda and justin broke up but i guess its for the best right they both got on eachothers nerves so oh well i still love them both!!! Mo and patrick are ok now they both wanna get back with eachother but need time, and me n ryan are doing greaaaaatttttttttttt!!!!!!!!! ok hes out and so am i!!

XO: JaYmEe XO:

i love ryan forever...................

ok whoever that was talkin shit to monique on my last entry STOP talkin shit please.  neways i havent writtin in this thing in forever. well hey its spring break yeaaaaaa............not ryans been gone since last sunday and i miss himm so much i even went to visit him but then i had to leave him again. oh well ill see him tomorrow night till after work. dude ok corey wtf where are u? i havent heard ur name in forever and i miss u sooo much im sure ryan told u about what happned a while ago and yea not to happy bout that but i need to vent so u need to call or write or sumthin i miss u bro!!!!!! i love u mo and manda!!! oh yea step i love u too if u read this and dont end it just b/c i made a mistake cuz if ur foreal about ending it ur a fucken hipacret b/c i never got mad at u for duin what u do i got mad at u b/c u started to care about what people thought. fuck people steph no matter what i still love u and ur still considered my stoodge!!! im out.........

XO: JaYmEe XO:

i love ryan forever....................

Lol ur sweet to mo and i wuv u and i hope u and patrick are still a happy lil couple of kiddos. and will have to pray again soon ok!!!  well andyways i starts working on sat mo and im freakin nervous i mean what if i mess up on the cash register or sumthin ahhhhhhh lol im reterted call me this weekend ok i love u i g2g

XO: JaYmEe XO:

i love ryan forever....................

mood: crazy music: watching one tree hill some fucking hot ass guys

Ok well anyways today we had that stupid fucking ass taks test........ok wtf is the point of that test u sit there read and write and circle shit and then best of all u sit there for 6 hrs not saying a damn thing. well anyways me n ryan are trying the new thing and well its going good for me so far but for him hes struggling with it hahaha. ok well im out meemaws bitchina nd im watching one tree hil oh yea peace!!!!!!!1

XO: JaYmEe  XO:

i love ryan forever...................